In Quito

This is more of just a quick update to let you all know that I’m alive and kicking in Quito. It turns out that I got really lucky with my host family because they are wonderful people. My Spanish is coming along quickly, which is helped by the classes we are taking while here in Quito.

A lot has happened so far, but it doesn’t really seem like it…well, mostly this weekend seemed to last for weeks, which is actually rather nice. I’ve done a lot so far. I saw a penitence parade on Friday, hiked up a mountain on Saturday and went to a real-life soccer game today, crazed fans and everything. I took a ton of pictures when we went up to the mountain (Pichincha, I believe), but I don’t think I’m going to have a chance to upload them for a while for lack of access to a sufficiently fast computer and internet connection. I am keeping a journal so that I can fill you all in on the details of my adventures at a later date. I’ve actually got a few emails that I’ve written that include most of the details, but I’ll get around to the ol’ copy-and-paste when I’ve got more to relate.

So, in summary, things are going well, my Spanish is coming along, and I am generally enjoying myself! There are definitely a few things that I really miss already (and a few people), but I still have a lot ahead of me to look forward to! Like I said, I’ll keep this updated once in a while, but for now I am going to concentrate on enjoying myself in Ecuador and staying away from large crowds of crazed soccer fans.

A luego!

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Music: nada, nilch, zip, zero (I don’t have my computer and music…)

On my way out

It is weird to think that I will be away for three months very soon. So much can happen in three months. I am definitely going to miss out on a few things, which is fine, but at the same time I’d rather not have to go away.

Not that I’m being forced to leave. Quite the opposite. I am really looking forward to this opportunity to take a break from my life as it is right now and venture off to somewhere wondrous that I am not familiar with at all. It will be an experience that will very likely shape my life from now on to some extent.

For those of you who do not know the context of this post, I am off to Ecuador at the end of March and will be there until the beginning of July. The program that I am going on is organized by a professor at the University of Oregon, Peter Wetherwax, and is known as NEP, or Neo-tropical Ecology Program. Eighteen of us are flying down to Quito to study Spanish for a couple weeks before we meet up with Peter and begin exploring all of the wonders that Ecuador has to offer. Early on, we will be hiking in the Andes and even be reaching an elevation of 16,000 feet. Later, we will fly out to the Amazon basin in the east of Ecuador where we will spend about a week conducting research projects. The project I will be working on has to do with what are called phytotelmata, or temporary pools that collect in plants and plant detritus. I will be doing research into the kinds and relationships of organisms that live in these temporary environments. Later we will be going elsewhere in Ecuador, visiting the different kinds of rainforest and even hanging out in some of the canopies. Toward the end of the program, we’ll take a boat over to the Galapagos islands to see the amazing animals there. Our program actually finishes around May 23rd or so, but I will be staying an extra month and a week to take time to wander around Ecuador or find some sort of work or service opportunity. I don’t have anything truly planned yet, which is both exciting and extremely scary.

As I am not getting back until July, I will be missing the graduation of a number of people here at the U of O. I am also disappointed that I will not be able to visit all of my former classmates at Mudd while they are all still there. Many of them will have graduated and moved on to grad school or the real world. Even though I am sad that there is no guarantee that I will see them all again, I am so overjoyed at having had the chance to befriend them and I am happy for their success so far and I wish them luck for their future endeavors.

Like I’ve said before, the best thing about good friends is that they live in your heart forever, whether or not you see them again in this lifetime. This is not to say that I don’t expect to see many people from my past again, but instead that I will not be unsatisfied if I don’t in fact get that chance. Disappointed, perhaps, but not unsatisfied. I am perfectly satisfied with having met them and interacted with them and hugged them, etc. That definitely is something that I can never lose.

I am not sure what the extent of my communication from Ecuador will be, but perhaps I’ll find some time to jot something down here or on Facebook. Any pictures that I take will very likely have to wait until after I get back, but I promise that there will be some spectacular ones, barring having my camera stolen.

Finally, I want to say that I really appreciate everyone who takes the time to read these posts, however infrequent (or strange) they are. It’s always nice to know that my spewings are read. Thanks again!

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Music:
Must Be Dreaming – Frou Frou
Millionaire – Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack
The Youth – MGMT
Living in a Bubble – Eiffel 65
Guitar Hero – Amanda Palmer
Miss You – The Rolling Stones
Day One – Blackalicious
My Interpretation – Mika
Mayday – Jason Webley
Kissing the Lipless – The Shins

Belatedness 2

It has been a while. Again. Oh well. So is the nature of this blog.

As I haven’t had a post in more than a month (partially due to the fact that I’ve been busy with classes), I might as well fill you all in on what’s been happening.

Mostly I’ve been busy. Not terribly busy, but busy none the less. I find that I have a lot of reading to do this term. I listed my classes in my last post, but I’ll list them again: organic chemistry, biochemistry (BI 214), a class on early Judaism (the midterm was yesterday), and a reading class including all of us who are going to Ecuador in the spring. Basically, I have a lot of required reading for the Judaism class, which I have basically neglected to do the majority of, and so far a lot of reading for the reading class (really good books, though). We read a book called Tropical Nature: Life and Death in the Rain Forests of Central and South America, which is chock full of all sorts of awesome and interesting facts and observations. I really recommend it if you are a biology geek to any extent. We also just finished a book called Savages, which follows the travels and experiences of Joe Kane (the author) in his interactions with the natives of the Ecuadorean rain forests, specifically the Huaorani (now spelled Waorani), and also the impact of big oil on their way of life. It, too, is a great book and I’d recommend it.

The nice thing about my other classes (biochem and organic chem) is that they don’t actually have any required homework, which kind of has been a blessing and a curse. A blessing since I would definitely not be able to get all the work done and a curse because it leaves me less prepared and knowledgeable about the material. Surprisingly, this hasn’t been much of a problem in organic chemistry (exam on Wednesday went well, I believe), but has had more of an impact on my knowledge of the biochem material. It may also have to do with the fact that I have biochem at 9:00 in the morning.

Luckily my courseload isn’t bad at all, but I still have less time than normal. Part of this is because I’ve started practicing with the U of O ultimate team on Mondays and Wednesdays, and even went to a tournament with them last weekend. Unfortunately, I seem to have tweaked my lower back (it seems to happen occasionally), so I was completely unable to play the second day. It’s gotten better over the past couple days and I’m planning on seeing a physical therapist next week to make sure it isn’t anything major.

All of these activities seem to leave me with not a whole lot of time during the week (oh, yeah, I’m also taking a time management class until next week) which leaves me with less time at work, which is annoying. It isn’t fun to only work eight hours a week and see your paycheck amount to about half of last month’s.

Life around the house has been pretty good, although almost everyone is really busy getting ready for the conference they are putting together, which you can check out at their website. I really respect and admire what they are doing and I hope it helps make a difference. During the actual conference, though, I may be hiding away at a friends apartment so that I don’t go crazy with all the people around (we are hosting a bunch of people in the house). I really need to clean my room before that happens, too.

Finally, I am planning on actually purchasing my plane tickets to and from Ecuador tomorrow. I will be leaving on March 28th and have decided to stay about a month past when the program ends to get back in early July. As I’ve mentioned, this scares the heck out of me, but I know it will be good for me and that I can only benefit from it.

More to come later, as always.

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On another note, I bought myself a Dvorak keyboard cover so that I can practice it. It definitely a good investment since I am enjoying not getting any crumbs or anything into my keys either. Now, to get on to actually using the layout…

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Music:
Millionaire – Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack
Blackbird – Across the Universe soundtrack
Bomb the World – Michael Franti & Spearhead
Bukowski – Modest Mouse
New World Rising – Evan Hazen Kimble
Know Your Onion! – The Shins
I Will Possess Your Heart – Death Cab For Cutie
Getting Better – The Beatles
There’ll Come A Time – The John Butler Trio
Maxwell’s Silver Hammer – The Beatles
Because – Across the Universe soundtrack
We Used To Be Friends – The Dandy Warhols
Be My Escape – Reliant K
Disconnected – Funkstörung & Enik

Visitor

While it has been a while since my last post, I cannot say that this particular post will be full of great content. In fact, it is likely to be somewhat lackluster and lacking for those of you who just love reading about my life. Anyway, I suppose I should get on with it then.

As you may have noticed, I have not used actual names in my blog, but I may be changing that. I have done this in order to keep it anonymous, but I’m starting to think that it might enrich the blog itself to include these.

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First of all, next week is our first week of classes, which is kind of annoying more than anything else. As you may already know, I’ve had a pretty full summer and haven’t had much true time off. Actually, this probably is me just blowing this out of proportion. Ah, well. I must say I’ve had a pretty good summer. As to the fall, I’ll be taking about 3 and a half classes. I am taking organic chemistry (yay!?), biochemistry (huh?), and an early Judaism class (what the…?). Oh, and I have a reading course that is part of our getting ready to go to Ecuador. It should be a fun class, as the content so far (yeah, I’ve begun the reading already) is pretty interesting. Even with just these classes, I’m expecting this to be a tough term, considering the content. I’ve heard horror stories about o-chem, but I really do want to see what all the hype is about (whether or not I regret it later).

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So, part of what made this summer more than reasonable was the fact that I met a number of really cool people. First of all, my summer classes had a few really cool people in them. I also got connected with some new people through my current friends. Two or three, in particular, I met through my new housemate, Daniel (not to be confused with my other housemate, Dan). One of them is Mike, who is currently dating Daniel. Mike is a great guy who has been really good for Daniel (as far as I can see), and also helps bridge the slight gap that exists between Daniel and the rest of us. I don’t like to admit it, but it’s there. Mike is helping by just being someone who we can all really relate to.

The second and rather significant person that I have met through Daniel is Ottavia, or Otti for short. She’s an Italian girl who was visiting Portland for the summer and came down for a weekend to hang out with Daniel. The first night I met her, we talked on and on until 3 in the morning or so. Unfortunately, she left the next day, but I’ve been in contact with her almost every day for the past couple weeks and it is just great to talk to her. There is a significant time difference (+9 hours), which is sometimes annoying, but we seem to have a schedule. I’ve learned a lot about the culture over in Italy as a result and she has learned lots of random things from me. I really enjoy our conversations and hope they continue for a while yet.

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Quote of the week: “Nik, you have a smile that rivals the universe.” (not sure about the exact wording)

Spoken by Lance, another person I met this summer and hope to hang out with more often, while rather intoxicated. Of course, I was completely sober. He had a number of compliments for me that night.

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Music:
Make You Feel That Way – Blackalicious
Sweet – The Shook Twins
In the Dark of the Night – Anastasia soundtrack
Another Race – Eiffel 65
Ting Ting – The Shook Twins
Know Your Onion! – The Shins
This Time Around – Hanson
Anniversary – Voltaire
You Gotta Feel It – Spoon
Your Heart Is An Empty Room – Death Cab For Cutie
Monday – Orbital
Icarus – Jason Webley
One Perfect Sunrise – Orbital

Addiction and longing

It has been a while since my last post. Unfortunately, I think the main reason for this has to do with video games.

See, I signed up for a beta-testing account with this game called Heroes of Newerth. It is essentially a DotA clone, for those of you who know what that is. For those of you who don’t, it is sufficient to say that it is an online, multiplayer game. Basically, I have been playing this almost every free moment that I have, often times when I shouldn’t technically have free time. I was able to get away from it for a little while today in order to make some progress on the book I am currently reading, but the fact is, I am addicted.

I’m not really talking about this in the sense of “I am totally addicted to these muffins my mother makes,” but in the real sense. Truthfully, I think about this game almost non-stop, even dream about it. In my spare time when I can’t be playing, I look at the forums for guides on how to properly play the different heroes in the game and improve as a player. I can compare this to a very similar experience I had with the game Super Smash Brothers Melee, which is instead a console game, but just as addictive. I think what draws me to these games in part is that they have a lot of little skills to learn and improve on. Each game is different because you are not playing against the computer, but other humans, so you are required to adjust and adapt. I am somewhat addicted to some other single-player games, but not nearly to the extent of these. SSBM is a large part of the reason why I had to come home from Mudd, I would say.

Basically, I’m not sure what I should do about this. I’ll definitely have to give it up before the school year starts, or I won’t get anywhere. I think I can do this, but I am slightly worried. I will have a lot on my plate as it is this fall and I cannot add this problem to the mix.

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In other news, I saw a friend a few days ago who I hadn’t seen in a long while. He was basically just stopping in town before beginning his road trip back to school and came by the house. In truth, he didn’t come over to see me, but instead one of my housemates. I am fine with this, but I feel as though I have lost some of the connection I had with him in high school. We were basically inseparable during our first two years and somehow we have drifted apart since then. I suppose we have our differences, but I really enjoy hanging out with him. I haven’t really had a chance to do so for a couple years now, and somehow it has become slightly awkward, like we just met and are only in the same room because we have a connection through a mutual friend.

I miss the days when friendships seemed so simple. There was no drama about who is willing to hang out with who or which people have been having a conflict of interest. It was just you had your friends and they hung out with you without any pretense. Just for the sake of hanging out. There didn’t have to be any direction to it. No goal, no event needed to bring you together. There was never the awkwardness of needing to do something together. You didn’t even really have to talk.

Maybe it just seemed that way because we were in school and only had the time between classes and during lunch. Maybe it was just because I had such a distance barrier between home and my social life that I considered those times so precious.

But they were precious. They were some of the happiest times during my life. Nothing big. Just hanging out during lunch. Playing the same card game every day. Maybe it was the regularity of it that I so valued. The fact that it never seemed to change. It was timeless, in a sense.

I’m also scared to think that I may never have that kind of experience again. We all are going our separate ways. It becomes more and more apparent as we near the end of our schooling and begin to find our own paths. I have never been one to embrace change willingly and this shit just scares the bejeezus out of me.

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Music:
Don’t Panic – Coldplay
Somewhere I Belong – Linkin Park
Don’t Let Me Down – Across the Universe soundtrack
Drunken Lullabies – Flogging Molly
The District Sleeps Alone Tonight – The Postal Service
Ocean Breathes Salty – Modest Mouse
Title and Registration – Death Cab For Cutie
Song Beneath the Song – Maria Taylor
Blindsided – Bon Iver
Say Goodbye Hollywood – Eminem

The worst, best, and most important decision

I don’t believe I have posted about this before, but I feel like I come back to this a lot, both in my mind and in conversations. This decision that I am talking about occurred around the middle of November in 2007. This choice, as some of you may know, was whether I was going to leave Harvey Mudd and come back home to Oregon, or to try to work through all the trouble I was having with my schoolwork. In hindsight, this choice was pretty obvious, but at the time that wasn’t the case. I think was the first time I really and truly admitted to myself that something was not right. It was a tough realization to have. It was also the first time in my life that I cried into the lap of someone who was not one of my parents. That particular moment in time was when I actually said out loud “I think I need to go home,” or something similar. It was long enough ago that I cannot remember the particulars, although the emotions I felt and my surroundings are still real enough. I remember that I struggled to say those words, even as I knew the truth of them. I was just emerging from my denial, which I believe is the hardest part.

I guess my point is that however uncomfortable the decision was, I am glad I made it the way I did. What I mean by this is that there is so much that has happened between then and now that I would never want to give up. Yes, a large part of it was unpleasant, but it was worth it. I know more about myself than I ever have before and there are parts of me that I have acquired in that time that I never would have known about in any other case. Basically, who I am now is too precious to me to give up.

This is not to say that I am glad I came home from Mudd. Far from it. Harvey Mudd and the other Claremont colleges are one of my favorite places in terms of culture and intellectual capacity. There will never be another place quite like that small square mile in the middle of the southern Californian desert. However, I think I want to say that it was a very healthy decision for me to leave. Those of you who were there with me at the time know at least some of what I was going through and how unfortunate it would have been if I had forced myself to continue on the way I was.

Also, I want to say thank you to all of you who supported me (and still do) in my decision and helped me get through it. I will never have words enough for my gratitude.

There is no particular reason for this post other than the fact that I had been thinking about it and the things I wanted to express were coming fairly easily to mind. Take it as you will, but be aware of the significance it has to me.

Hare day

Apparently I am very bad at updating regularly. However, I am not terribly surprised. I guess the fact that I am slightly stressing about this ecology project that I have due this week is not helping. I have also been thinking about trying to include some more substance in my posts, since currently I am just posting about my day-to-day experiences. I’m thinking along the lines of a thought of the day or pondering about some interesting question.

Also, I’d really like to know who’s reading this, so feel free to comment and let me know what you think. I believe it just asks for your email (which is not displayed) and a name of some kind (real or not) in order to post. Suggestions of any kind are welcome!

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Last week I went out to my parents’ house to gather some of the data for my ecology project. The actual data I was collecting was simply the diameters of a few trees in three different stands of planted Douglas-firs. Fortunately, it was fairly easy to do (once I got my method down), but unfortunately, there were a lot of mosquitoes, meaning that I managed to get about seven different bites within the space of about five minutes. Soon after realizing this extreme concentration, I retreated back to the house to put on some insect repellent. After that, I wasn’t really bothered. When I had finished for the day, I was driving back down our driveway and caught sight of a jackrabbit of some kind. I did some research later, and I’m pretty sure it was a black-tailed jackrabbit, as shown in the image. I think the thing that amazed me the most about seeing it was the length of its ears. I don’t remember exactly, but it seemed that they were at least a third of the length of its body. It stood there for a little while even though I was in a car, watching it. I wish I had had my camera.

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Last Tuesday, of course, I played ultimate again with the city league. If I remember correctly, the weather was nicer (read: cooler) than it had been the past couple weeks, which is always good. The highlight of that day was that we actually won a game! This is very exciting for us, especially since we beat that team soundly. 9-4 or something along those lines was the final score. We didn’t win our second game, but we were still living off of the thrill of finally winning.

In related, albeit grosser, news, my sunburned skin began to bubble because of the sweat, generated during ultimate, collecting underneath. This is a very interesting phenomenon and I always find it fascinating (this wasn’t the first time). It isn’t like it acts like it is infected or anything, but it is pretty weird.

Anyway, I played pickup ultimate again on Thursday, which was fun. The weather was really beginning to cool at this point, which made for fantastic playing conditions. After the majority of people had left for the night, we played Boot, which is a variant on ultimate in which you have to knock down cones (or water bottles, if cones are lacking) to score. Basically, you have a smaller field without designated boundaries, and two pairs of cones set up about 20 or 30 yards away from each other. You play with three or four players to a team and move the disc back and forth in order to knock down cones. Where the gameplay really changes is that although you must move the disc at least half of the length between the cones before scoring, you can score at either end. This makes it very interesting because the other team can be moving down toward one end and then suddenly switch directions and score at the other end. My team was rather good at this, actually. Also, when you score, you don’t give the disc to the other team, you just keep going (making sure to move at least half the length of the field before you score, of course). We rarely keep track of the scores as it is just so entertaining. It is a great game to play and is definitely always a highlight of my week/day/whatever.

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On Friday of last week, I had another field trip with my ecology class, this time to H. J. Andrews Experimental Forest. It is located east of Eugene by 40 or 50 miles, near Blue River. The area is basically used like it is named: for experimentation. Our class went up there because it is a great place to find two rather different ages/kinds of forest just across the road from each other.

Again, I was driving for this trip, so I didn’t get the luxury of napping on the van, but it wasn’t too far, so I didn’t mind so much. Actually, I was kind of excited since I put together a mix CD for this trip and was slightly anxious to see how it would be received (refer to my previous post regarding my feelings on music). I didn’t get any complaints, and it seemed to be well-accepted, which was reassuring. I’ll post the track list at the end of this section.

Something else that was interesting that we saw on that trip was the large number of rough-skinned newts that were all over the road. As the professor was saying, they sometimes swarm so much that you’ll find dead newts all over the road. I have to admit I probably drove over at least one. The funny thing is that they just look like small sticks when you’re driving, although the shape is fairly distinct and they become easy to spot after a while. We actually stopped on the way in so that we could take a chance to look at one up close and hold it (although they do secrete a toxin, so you have to be careful afterward). It was a fun day, but tiring, as all field trips tend to be. I don’t think I made it to work that day.

Track list from mix CD:
We Will Become Silhouettes – The Postal Service
High Life – Daft Punk
Don’t You Evah – Spoon
Love Today – Mika
Viva la Vida – Coldplay
Float On – Modest Mouse
Pants – Orbital
My Name Is Jonas – Weezer
July, July! – The Decemberists
Living in a Bubble – Eiffel 65
Blood Bank – Bon Iver
The Funeral – Band of Horses
The New Underground – Guster
You Lot – Orbital
Come Together – Joe Crocker
You Got Yr. Cherry Bomb – Spoon
Long Division – Death Cab For Cutie
19-2000(Soul Child Remix) – Gorillaz
Blazing Arrow – Blackalicious

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Bringing us back to the subject of ultimate: we had our last city league game on Tuesday. Like the very first week, it was just one game with a 90 minute play time with a point cap of 21. This actually turned out to be a very fun game, despite the rather wet field (apparently they felt the need to swamp our field before we played on it). However, I did get a great lay-out that day, so I went home with a slightly muddy jersey, which I am always proud of.

That brings us around to the past couple days, which have been pretty rough. I had to collect the last of my data for my ecology project yesterday, and theoretically it was due this morning, but I talked to the professor and he is allowing me to turn it in before the final tomorrow at 8 o’clock in the morning. Again, I was having some trouble writing it, but I think I am figuring out what I need to do to get around this (fingers crossed). Anyway, I will be very happy when tomorrow evening comes around and I will be done with this current class and be free for the weekend before I start my general chemistry lab class (the third and final one in the series) on Monday. Blech.

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Music:
Bath Time – Orbital
Long Division – Death Cab For Cutie
Inner City Pressure – Flight of the Conchords
Last Battle – Cave Story soundtrack
The Two Sides Of Monsieur Valentine – Spoon
Tunnel Vision – Orbital
Sing – Canoe
Moonsong – Cave Story soundtrack
They Never Got You – Spoon
You Lot – Orbital

Twilight zone

Things seem to be back up for the moment, which is always great. I went to see my therapist today and we had a rather good session. I really like him because he doesn’t try to assure me that my problems will go away or anything, but instead has a very realistic view or opinion of things. He really seems to sympathize with me in a way that you wouldn’t usually think of. Anyway, I really get a lot out of every session I have with him, even if he does most of the talking (it has happened a couple times).

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As you may already know, I went rafting this weekend. We drove down around 10 o’clock after having breakfast at Brail’s. The car ride was about two hours to Merlin, which is a small town off of I-5, near the Rogue river. We went down past to a little town/resort (there wasn’t much to it other than this resort place) called Galice (pronounced GAH-leese). We checked in and drove up to the little cottage where we were staying to dump off our gear that we didn’t need for the actual rafting. We then walked down to the boat garage to get ourselves tahitis, which are kind of like inflatable canoes. We each got our own for this first trip. We put in at a place called Hog Creek, which is a few miles upriver of Galice. It took a little getting used to, but rowing in a tahiti isn’t terribly hard. Our first mishap actually happened pretty early on, in the first section of rapids actually. Two of our group (there were five) tipped after running into each other right next to this huge rock. The following section was pretty calm, but it is apparently very hard to get into a tahiti from the water with or without help. I stuck back with them to help for this reason.

There were a couple of other spills during that trip, but for the most part we all managed to stay in our boats. There were some rather exciting parts as well as a few very annoying sections where the wind was blowing up river enough that we went backward if we didn’t keep paddling. I also discovered that day that it is a very good idea to put sunscreen on your thighs when rafting since swimming trunks tend to ride up when you are sitting down for long periods of time. So yeah, I ended the day with some burnt thighs and a very burnt left shoulder (I don’t really know how I missed it) since we were on the river for three hours or so. We stopped at the Galice resort around 5 o’clock and went to dinner shortly thereafter. We were so tired when we got back to the cottage that all we could manage to do was watch part of 300, which I hadn’t seen before, before we all collapsed from exhaustion.

The second day (Saturday), we got a full-sized five or six person raft. I enjoyed this rowing a lot more since you basically have to work together to move the thing, and you move pretty well when you do. I was up front on the left the whole time, so I got wet fairly regularly, which was rather nice (and cold). I couldn’t decide if it was scarier going down the river in the tahitis or on the raft, since it is a lot harder to avoid obstacles in the raft due to its size. We did the full stretch from Hog Creek to Grave Creek, so we saw a large amount of territory that we hadn’t covered the day before, and it took the whole day. We stopped again at Galice for lunch this time before hopping back in our raft for the final (and unfamiliar) section. At one point we came across a very beautiful area alongside the river that had managed to grow into a meadow which then melded with the base of the hills that made up the river valley. It was amazing. I almost wished I had actually brought my camera along in the raft until I remembered how much water was being splashed around. The only problem we had with wind was at the very end (after some particularly exciting rapids) during the last hundred yards. I had some very tired shoulders by the end of the day

We took one of the provided vans back to the resort where we got cleaned up and went to dinner at a nice little restaurant in Merlin called the Backroad Grille or something like that. They had some really good food, including what they called (if I remember correctly) RBG rolls, which are essentially spring rolls stuffed with cream cheese, baked, and then served with a sweet jalapeño sauce. They were extremely good. I had a chicken pot pie that had been baked into a dish with a pastry-like dough just thrown on top. It was really cool to see when they brought it out. After that very good dinner we got ready to go back to the cottage.

As we were walking out, we noticed something very strange: the fading daylight outside was particularly yellow, kind of like we were in some kind of science fiction movie. It was so strange. It seemed like I was wearing some brown-lensed sunglasses, except that I couldn’t take them off. I think we thoroughly enjoyed ourselves speculating about the coloring and how strange it was. The actual sunset itself was very stunning as well, with some of the clouds a bright orange against the blue sky. There were even some very blue clouds in front of the orange ones that made for a great contrast of hues. Overall, it was an amazingly-colored evening. Again, however, we were so bushed that we hit the hay before 10, which gave us just enough time to finish the rest of 300.

The next morning we drove back up to Eugene with four of us in one car, since the other had to leave early to get to a bike race he was taking part in that morning. As we drove, we listened to the playlist on my iPod, which is basically a mix of all of the music that I listen to. While listening to that, I had a bit of an epiphany. I realized that if someone listened to the whole of that list, they could really get a good idea of my personality. I actually talked to my therapist about this and he agreed that music can be a very powerful form of expression, whether it is something you create or just something that you listen to.

Basically, if you want to know who I am, take a day to listen to my playlist. I think it really could give you a good deal of insight into my personality and perhaps explain some of my stranger characteristics.

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Music:
The Beginning Of The End – Guster
Papercut – Linkin Park
Yellow – Coldplay
This Way – On The Rocks
Be My Escape – Reliant K
The Beast And Dragon, Adored – Spoon
Everybody’s Gotta Learn Sometime – Beck
Portions for Foxes – Rilo Kiley
Mother, Just Can’t Get Enough – New Radicals
Know Your Onion! – The Shins

Off

Well, I’m off to go rafting with some friends this weekend and we are leaving fairly soon, so this will likely be a short post.

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For some reason it has been a somewhat disappointing week. I’m not sure if there is anything in particular that has made it so, but I realize now that I am slipping back into my semi-depressed state. It may be related to the fact that I don’t think I’m getting enough sleep, but it may also just have to do with how busy I am with school and work.

Basically, there are a few signs that are indicators. First, I start to play video games more often. It is a coping mechanism of sorts kind of like other people get drunk or high instead of facing things. Secondly, I stop working out and/or being active (I didn’t go play ultimate frisbee pickup yesterday, which was really disappointing). Thirdly, my mother notices and I stop being as open with my parents. I don’t know exactly whether it is just that I don’t want them to know that anything is wrong, but I just don’t tell them certain things, or I just have things that I think wouldn’t make them happy. Of course, feelings of loneliness return and I tend to feel sorry for myself. I also worry. One thing about me is that I almost never worry. Yes, I may get a little anxious about things, but not worry. I guess one final thing is that I begin to feel bad about things that I haven’t done successfully or completely. Say, an assignment that I didn’t finish or turn in. Usually this doesn’t phase me at all, which I attribute to my past experiences (when you have failed classes, this instinct kind of disappears).

Like I said, my mother seems to have noticed there is something wrong and she mentioned that I should find some time to see my therapist again, with which I am totally beginning to agree. Problem is, I don’t have a lot of time to spare between my class and work and ultimate. However, I may be able to take a break from work on Monday or Wednesday to go. We’ll see. I’ll probably call him in the next couple days and see what he has available.

Anyway, I’m off soon. I really hope I enjoy this weekend, but I’m not sure how much I’ll be into it. I’m fairly confident that I’ll warm up to it when we get there.

Toodles.

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Music:
Gansta Blues – Slumdog Millionaire soundtrack
We Will Rock You – Queen
Everything You Ever – Dr. Horrible
Music That Puts Everything Together – Jason Webley
Short Circuit – Daft Punk

The Great Red Spot and shrimp in my hand

I apologize for the infrequency of my postings. I would love to make one post every two or three days, but sometimes the topic on my mind for the few days (or longer) is of a more personal manner. I’m glad I was able to write my last post, since I wouldn’t normally do that. But hey, this is the internet and everything seems to find its way here somehow. I’m not sure of the coherence of that statement and whether it follows, but it is…well, it is actually a rather silly statement. Moving on.

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Last Friday I went to the coast on a field trip with my ecology class. We had to leave at 6:30, so I needed to get up around 5:00, which I don’t like to do very often as I tend to get to bed after midnight or later. For that, though, I was able to get to bed a little early, despite the fact that I had to run to Sundance at 10:15 or so to get bread for my lunch the next day and get something to feed myself for dinner. I had had a rather busy day and I played ultimate that evening, so I was pretty bushed.

Anyway, I was one of the drivers for the trip, so I didn’t have the luxury of sleeping in the van on the way, which really hit me about an hour and a half or so into the drive. I managed to stay awake for the whole drive there. We went to Yaquina Head, which is just north of Newport, to take some observational data and poke around in the tide pools. This was a pretty cool area and had some really interesting creatures like sea urchins, sea anemones, crabs and some other intriguing stuff including a whole lot of some sort of fly, which were everywhere. Part of the fun in that area was to just keep one’s balance on the rocks and swat at the flies at the same time. I wasn’t too bothered by the flies, but I saw a couple of tourists who just couldn’t handle it and gave up the magic of the tide pools for the safety of the wind on the higher ground. It was a beautiful day, so the conditions were mild and just a little warm.

After visiting the little museum nearby the light house, we drove down to the Hatfield Marine Science Center, which is located right next to the Rogue brewery and the Newport aquarium. There we took samples in a nearby mud flat on Yaquina bay, just a little inland. We used what are called “shrimp guns” to dig down into the mud to find organisms. The “gun” is basically some PVC pipe with a plunger inside that one can use to suck up mud and extrude it up for examination. Our professor actually found a live shrimp after taking a number of random samples nearby, which was really cool. I even held the shrimp in my hand for a few minutes. It is rather amazing. The shrimp at first didn’t move at all, but eventually it began to scrape its legs on my hand, as if trying to burrow. It is such a strange sensation to have something lightly scraping the center of your palm. If you get the chance, try this. After that, we put the shrimp back down in a hole to find its burrow again.

We had lunch just outside of the science center, which is actually connected to OSU somehow. There wasn’t a whole lot to the center available to the public, but it had a number of live specimens, the octopus being one of the cooler ones. It was fun to just watch it breathe, actually, let alone the movement of its arms. The also had an interesting interactive globe which would project the planets on its surface so you could look at them one at a time. I actually took a long look at Jupiter, especially its Great Red Spot. It is such an interesting phenomenon, if you thing about it. A “storm” that lasts for thousands of years or more. I suppose it is probably similar to the great ocean currents of Earth, but still intriguing. Soon after lunch, we got back in the vans and drove home. I was only able to make it part of the way before Prof. Crabtree took over driving our van.

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Not a whole lot happened over the weekend, other than a minor case of depression, which was helped by a visit to the Saturday market to get a burrito from Ritta’s. I actually hadn’t thought of it until then, but the Saturday market might be a good place to look around for the girl from my last post. I will definitely try to make it there again in the coming weeks. On Sunday, we had D&D session again (I’ve missed the last couple) and got to fight giants, which are rather tough, as you might expect, but we were able to take them on while at level 8, despite the fact that they were technically CR 9s. In that campaign I play a monk with some pretty awesome magic items, but unfortunately fists and kicks are not all that effective against giants. I did alright, though.

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In other news, I basically have the balance down for handstands, and I will be looking to practice a lot more in the coming weeks. I usually do some before playing ultimate on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and I keep getting better and better. I’ve gotten a couple sore shoulders from it, but my guess is that will go away as the joints strengthen. I think I am setting my next goal to walk the length of a frisbee field on my hands. That’s almost definitely at least a month or two off, but I think I’ll get there. It’s really fun.

Well, class in the morning. I should try to get some sleep in this heat. I finally put up screens, though! I hopefully won’t boil like I did the other night.

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Some of the music playing during the writing of this:
Last Battle – Cave Story soundtrack
Circle of Life – Lion King
C’mon – Guster
Elephant Love Medley – Moulin Rouge
99 Luftballoons – Nena
Fear of Power – Shadow of the Colossus
Starry Eyed Surprise – Paul Okenfold
Polar Bears – Jason Webley & Andru Bemis (“ducks and pigeons/lines and squares…”)